The first time my grandson asked me how to spell a word, I answered so fast you would have thought I was competing in a spelling bee. I thought I was helping by correcting every mistake.

If he wrote “frend” instead of “friend,” I pointed out the missing letter. If he wrote “sed” instead of “said,” I quickly showed him the correct spelling.

My intentions were good, but soon I noticed a problem. Instead of trying a word independently, he began stopping and asking, “Is this right?” Sometimes he waited for me to spell the entire word before he wrote anything.

My help was making him less confident.

Children between the ages of three and four are naturally curious, imaginative, and increasingly independent. They are beginning to ask more questions, tell longer stories, recognize familiar letters, and make connections between the books they hear and the world around them.

At this age, preparing a child to read should not feel like formal instruction. The most effective learning happens through play, conversation, music, movement, drawing, and shared stories. These enjoyable experiences help children develop the language, comprehension, sound awareness, and early phonics skills they will eventually use to become confident readers.

Reading with a grandchild can be one of the sweetest parts of the day. You snuggle in, open the book, turn the first page, and prepare for a magical literacy moment.

Then you ask, “Do you like this book?”

Your grandson says, “Yes.”

And there it is. The conversation is over before it even put on its shoes.

Now, there is nothing wrong with a yes-or-no question. We all use them. They are simple, quick, and sometimes exactly what we need. “Are you ready?” “Do you want to read one more page?” “Is that puppy silly?” Those questions have their place.

Wait! Don’t answer yet.

That is what I wish someone had whispered to me the first time I sat with my grandson, opened a book, asked a very good question, and then immediately answered it myself.

Yep, I used to think I was being helpful.

I would sit with my grandson, open a book, point to a picture, and ask what I thought was a very good question. “What color is the dinosaur?” Then, before he had a chance to answer, I would jump right in.