Out-Loud Words: Don’t Let Your Values Collect Dust in a Box

When our boys were little, we read all kinds of books together. Ten in the Bed was so well loved that the pages separated from the bindings. Polar Express wasn’t just a Christmas Story but a year-round journey to the North Pole. And Good Night Moon we read as a bedtime ritual. They grew into silently reading the Harry Potter series as they entered elementary school, but our out-loud story time didn’t diminish until much later. They developed a love for books and boosted their learning and educational progress.

Reading out loud sharpens young minds, boosts their listening skills, fosters their imagination, enhances communication, and much more. When teachers, parents, and grandparents read out loud to their children, they are advancing literacy development. But what if you are trying to enhance the development of their values? Can you use those same principles to install your family’s vision, mission, and core values in a meaningful way for a preschooler? Or will the statement achieve scholarly excellence but end up on a shelf out of sight?

My aunt and uncle developed a Vision, Mission, and Core Values Statement for their family. It started with, “Our mission is not only to survive but to achieve. We must do so with morality, though maturity and in happiness.” It continued with three more paragraphs defining what it means to succeed as a family. An impressive statement, unfortunately, life happens, and the message ended up in a box. Their eight children found it after their parents passed away. Maybe it was the big message, not the day-to-day out-loud words, that caused the statement to be lost with time.

Having exact out-loud words drives the point home to what is significant. For example, “I can do it” or “Never give up” promotes hard work and being able to endure when things get tough. In our family, we have the core value of perseverance. Since that is a big word for a small child to understand, simply stating out loud, “You can do it,” reflects that value. Integrity is another, but rephrasing it as “Do what’s right” can be taught to even the little ones. If you want to encourage learning, education, or knowledge, “Ask Questions” can be a statement easily understood. Remember to be patient when asked repeatedly “why.” You are instilling a core value of curiosity and knowledge.

How do you create your own family’s out-loud words? If you have a family vision, mission, and core values statement, you can start there. Take the adult version of the value and simplify it so something meaningful to a child.

Achievement = Think Big

Confidence = I know I can, I know I can

Courage = Be Brave

Faith = God Loves You

Golden Rule = Be Nice

Gratitude = Say thank you

Happiness = Smile

Integrity = Do what’s right

Knowledge = Ask Questions

Perseverance = You can do it

Trustworthiness = Speak the truth

If you don’t have core values already determined, think about short, kid-friendly topics about beliefs you would like to pass down to your children and grandchildren. There should be no more than five, or it will be too overwhelming. Ask yourself, what do I think a good person looks like? What does success look like for an adult? What personal traits would you like to see once they are grown? What are other principles vital to you and your family?

Besides repeating these phrases often, use a multifaceted approach for the best retention. It is valuable to tell stories about the quoted words. As an example, for perseverance, “Remember when grandpa did so poorly on an exam that he wasn’t allowed into school? He studied hard to try again and was able to do much better the next time.” Stories paint a colorful picture of the lesson you are teaching. The tales can be embellished to make a point but not so far-fetched other values are compromised. You can also ask how the child demonstrated that value today. Or ask which one of the out-loud words they saw today in themselves, another student, or the teacher.

Visuals are also a means to instill the quotes. Although they might not be able to read yet, they will become accustomed to how the word looks. To accomplish this visual, have the saying on the wall in a frame or decorative writing (we don’t recommend cursive). Painting stepping stones or rocks can be an attractive display. A rock can be taken along if they feel they need the reassurance of a particular value that day. Buying motivational wristbands can be used as a daily reminder to wear one or all the words and phrases. Or create with your child their visual representation of the value in a picture, a song, or other unique ways.

However, the best way to pass along your core values and what is important to the family is by your actions. If you aren’t trustworthy, they will use your example over your out-loud words. If you demonstrate the opposite of what you preach, the message will be lost on tiny ears. Be mindful of living up to your values daily, weekly, and always. But most of all, don’t let your values collect dust only to be recognized after you die. Live them today!

What values do you want to pass to the rising generations?